Posted in Writings

Perhaps Love ?

(WARNING: This entry contains cheesiness, and I apologize beforehand.)

 

I really don’t understand.

It was totally unexpected.

Have you guys ever had this moment when you all of a sudden realize you have special feelings for someone you never expected?

One morning, I woke up with him on my mind. And for the whole day, he’s the only one in my mind. It’s very hard to explain it in words. No proper words can fully describe what love is. But could I consider this feeling to be love?

Is this what being in love is like? I’ve had crushes before and its always been one-sided. Its always me expecting something from the other party, and eventually ends up with me in agony. But this time, I can’t understand the feelings I have for him. I am very confused, up to this point. Honestly, looking back on my past flings and one-sided infatuations, they weren’t that great either. I’m the type of woman who looks on what’s inside more than on the outside.

He wasn’t my ideal type nor someone I’m dreaming to be with someday. He ain’t that Mr. Perfect I’ve been thinking about. He isn’t that great of a guy physically but I guess its his personality that caught my eye. I’ve only known him for a short period of time. And we only see each other twice, but mostly once, a week. But in those short moments I’m spent with him, he left my heart baffled in a cloud of confusion. Whenever I see him or with simply just the thought of  him, I get this butterflies in my stomach and my heart starts beating really really fast.

I found a quote somewhere and it says, “Sometimes, you can’t really say what you see in a person. It’s the way they take you to another place nobody else can.” I guess it’s true, at least in my case. He makes everyone around him annoyed, but at the same time, gives them laughter. Yes, he is quite immature but whenever I look in his eyes, I sense a sense of maturity within him. We never really talked deeply before but we tease each other, call each other with funny nicknames. And I know myself that its my way of conversing or expressing my affection since I’m not the type to be cheesy or showy to people I love. I tease my friends the same way but with him, I feel like both of us are in a world where nobody else could be. Is this really what being in love is like?

I really have no idea what I see in him that makes my heart flutter whenever he’s around. Though I said that it’s possibly his personality that I adored but truthfully speaking, I still couldn’t decipher what my heart is telling me. My feelings for him is still undefined. They say, “No words can express what love is.”  Perhaps, am I in-love with him?

 

 

P.S: This entry made me cringe a lot since I am not the type of person to express cheesiness. Ironic eh?

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